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Checking In Like A BOSS!
June 7th, 2011 
10 secs later: Jumped on by 20 TSA agents and treated to a complimentary cavity search. So if you plan on doing this, wear your best leather jock strap and remember not to eat too much Mexican food the night before.
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April 28th, 2011
Just what the hell was that crappy song by Rebecca Black all about? It wasn't just sent from hell to torture us to death by choking on hate. No, it was about the JFK assassination of course. Duh.
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January 3rd, 2009
Plane crashes & suicide bombs are common reasons for early retirement to that place in the sky where Burger King never has queues & you never need to shower - WTF?
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April 6th, 2011
If you're a comic book character, vengeful or just trying to do your bit, it is absolutely paramount that you have deceased parents. All the better if the non-existence extends into other immediate family and beyond.
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July 22nd, 2009
One man's playground is another man's grave - Maybe they did it, no one ever suspects the little ones?
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July 10th, 2014
Playing a bum note on the trouser trumpet isn't usually cause for incarceration but if the offending gust is potent enough to cause an actual fight between a married couple then maybe it should be?
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June 24th, 2013
Eating must be nightmare for this guy/girl, could you imagine how tricky soup must be? You wouldn't want to be sat opposite them at lunch, it really would not be pretty. Someday their body is going to reject that pyrex plug and it won't be nice.
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July 8th, 2011
It's one of those tricks where you can see how the illusion is made, but you can NEVER unsee it. The word is often used but this time someone has managed to create a true mindf*ck. That's no moon! It's a death star of grass.
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January 12th, 2010
I hope you've been doing your revision gentlemen as this one's a toughie. And if you fail you'll be banned from this wondrous site forever!
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November 16th, 2010
Ain't this just the truth. Spy on your neighbour with a pair of binoculars and you're a perv, do it online on Facebook and, hey, why not? No one's gonna know, right? Plus your tissues don't get blown away by a pesky gust of wind.
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March 29th, 2011
If you ever need any help, don't be afraid to ask the internet. Sure you might not get exactly what you asked for but you'll sure as hell get a few unicorns and some narwhals, which are pretty much the solution to most things anyway.
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