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Why Cats Make Great Bodyguards
November 7th, 2011 
We all know that one day they will become the dominant species on the planet and enslave humans for their evil pleasures, but first they will have to overcome their obsession to chase laser pointers, until then mankind is safe.
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September 25th, 2012
They're a lot like regular horses but they require a whole lot more attention. Also if for any reason you stop buying them drinks they'll get uppity and leave.
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July 17th, 2008
It might look hapy now because summer's here and everyone wants to use him in the back yard - But give it a few months and he will be left alone and deserted - And he's won't be happy about it !
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February 13th, 2009
Can you even imagine how cheesy it must be down there? Blimey i wouldnt want to go near her for a long time after this, we i wouldnt want to go near her anyway she's minging.
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June 30th, 2011
Be. Afraid. If you thought Hitchcock's movie The Birds was scay (you wimp), then imagine if they'd had arms, big, bulky, muscular arms that they could slap you across the forehead with. Terrifying stuff.
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February 6th, 2012
The easiest way to speak Italian! Simply hold your hand in this position and wave it about a bit and Presto! You'll be speaking fluent nonsense and offending an entire continent's worth or people. Congrats, you racist.
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March 24th, 2014
If you could have just one wish what would it be? Bear in mind that whatever you say, the Genie will twist it into something terrible. Genies are bastards like that...
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April 27th, 2010
Filling an opposum with fireworks and lighting them isn't normal...on meth it is. And it does make you look like a total nut case which is cool.
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October 15th, 2008
She's a multi-talented actress, singer, and gravure idol from Japan with a passion for baseball - She also happens to be hotter than a thousand suns
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April 21st, 2011
Please dear god don't tell me that i missed out on the secrets of picking up smart chicks because i flunked math? This is SO ingenious that it's almost worth taking a night class to get up to speed!
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September 24th, 2010
Now where do we start with this? There’s a lot wong here. Firstly, the words ’sexual’ and ‘harassment’ should not be uttered in the same sentence when marketing a sex toy. Surely that’s not conducive to sexual fun?
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